I'm sitting here in bed, late at night, pondering about life.
At first I'm thinking of all the crap I have to do tomorrow. Before bed I have to thoroughly think what the next day will possibly throw at me, leading to me telling myself what I'm going to do to stop the possible madness. At this point in the night, the possibilities of tomorrow are innumerable.
For example:
"Val (that's me), if you don't take your medicine tomorrow you might die...so remember to take that."
"Val, if you don't study for physiology tomorrow you will fail your exam, dad will rip your heart out with his bear hands, and when you're a nurse someday you don't know how muscles work...so study tomorrow."
"Val, remember when you saw that pack of wolves in Colorado? Well, you never know when they might remember your scent and search you out...so grab your pepper spray tomorrow."
"Val, Halloween is over and the snooty neighbors are probably judging you for still having a pumpkin out...so remember to smash the snot out of it tomorrow."
You see my life holds many responsibilities. And these responsibilities came at me when I wasn't ready. Sometimes I think I'm a pro at handling my current responsibilities, but then something happens. An excellent example would be today. My phone was unjustly shut off. You see, when poor people can't pay their bills their things get shut off.
Needless to say I was not happy. Okay, that's an understatement. I was on the edge of sanity.
At first I had no idea. I was oblivious to the problem surrounding me, living in ignorant bliss. It started like any other day. I woke up late, grabbed a muffin, and drove like a maniac to work. And that's when it hit me.
I was minding my own business trying to send a text...but it WOULDN'T SEND. I figured oh, no biggie because I just have sketchy service. But logic told me, "Val, you always have service here." And to logic I responded, "You are absolutely correct. What is going on??"
I tried to call my mother, as any young adult would in a situation of crisis. And a demon of a machine told me "Your service has temporarily been shut off."
This is when things started hitting the fan. Automatically I got really nervous and started sweating (that's the first stage of my irrational flip outs). I tried to be logical with myself, "Val, it's okay. No one is trying to get ahold of you, and you aren't in a situation of emergency."
My brain said it was okay, but my heart said "This is NOT OKAY!!!!! GRASDOBVDFS!"
This led to a long, deep quest to revive my phone. It involved lots of driving, multiple awkward times of asking strangers for the use of a phone, and me falling down a flight of stairs in front of a group terrified elementary children.
So to make a long story short I got it fixed (after paying over $100 that I don't really have), and in the end I realized how first-worldly spoiled I am. I mean, did I REALLY have a reason to get so upset about this ordeal? No, the answer is no.
This led to me thinking about what I truly want in life. So while in bed I'm thinking about what I want in an ideal life. I've realized that I need to set goals for grown-up life. This way I'll know when I've truly become an adult. I've met the obvious criteria: Move out of parents abode (done), pay for own bills (done..most of the time), buy own groceries (either done or starving), further education (processing).
Anyways, this is when I shall know I've reached the high point of life. It's not a dream, like being a millionaire, living on a yacht, and breeding pandas. No, this is a logical goal. So here is goes...
First off I will have obtained an animal. Preferably a dog, but a cat will do. This pet will be my best companion. It will guard my house, as well as sleep with me every night.
Second, my current living area will be a pants free zone. I currently live with room mates, and they are great (mostly), but I want no pants! The only no pants zone in my house is my room. This is sad to me. It's too small of a space to do pants-free activities. Of course when people are over pants will go on in the case of this ideal living situation, but when no one is to be seen the pants will be off and the underwear frolicking will proceed.
Third is to get some kind of award for being the coolest nurse to ever bless little children with my presence. I'm in school to be a childrens' nurse. I plan on being the kind of nurse that is super funny and makes you laugh so hard that a patient will forget about the pain in their ruptured stomach because their abs are hurting so much from laughing at my hilariousness. I don't even care if the award is something a mere child makes out of paper and saliva. When I am handed an artifact expressing the appreciation of my awesomeness, I will know the success I've obtained.
Okay, earlier in my process of thinking I had a lot more grown-up goals. But to be honest, I got really stuck on the idea of not wearing pants because that's how much I love not being constricted to the confines of pants. And then I realized that I was wearing pants in my room. It was horrifying. So I had to naturally fix the problem. Then I was like, "Oh this is the life I dream of," and all my other goals seemed minuscule and left my mind.
Anyways, those are the most dire goals I have. And when I reach them, my heart will bubble with the joy of a dozen unicorns in heat.
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